Post Thirty eight :life’s just one big plot twist

Authors note 📝
I know I was missing for extreamly long but I hope you enjoy this post because I genuinely cannot guarantee when will be the next
Lifes to hectic people make dua I desperately need them. 💖

Loads of love: ayesha
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Little recap for all those who have forgotten :

– In the last post Yusra was slightly upset due to Riyaad acting very funny and rudely with her
-Yaasir tries to cheer Yusra up but if I may say fails miserably but shame he tried
-Yaasir speaks about how Zaneerah barely acknowledges his presence and how he wishes it were different between them
-Yaasir decides to give Zaneerah a good reason to love him he wants to show her his good side which is buried deep with in him.
-At the end of the last post Yaasir speaks about doing something that might ruin his own love life while making Zaneerahs
-Mohammed Sa’ad is Zaneerahs old school friend who moved to Cape Town.

             _____________________________

As narrated by Zaneerah :

“How could he! ”
“Who does he think he is to just go put his nose into my life!”
“What right does he have digging out my past and shoving it straight in my face!” I exclaimed while Sumayya and Tasneem listened attentively.

“I never thought I could hate someone so much” I said  and as I was saying this sumayya abruptly stopped me.

She said something, something that really hit deeply.

“You can’t really hate a person” she said looking at me in the eye.

“Uh, yes you can have you met Yaasir?!?” I replied dumbly.

” You see that’s where you confused , you don’t hate Yaasir you really just hate his actions. Who knows maybe he intended good in a way you and I can’t understand. ”

“Intended good in what way by just going and making me and Mohammed Sa’ad meet as if that would bridge the huge gap and void filled in our  friendship /relationship or rather the nameless relationship..
The relationship which could never truly be defined by a title.”  I said thinking out aloud.

“And thats what hurts the most losing someone that was truly never really yours.” Sumayya said looking at the sky.

That hurt because only I know and understand what Mohammed Sa’ad meant to me, he wasn’t just my friend..

He was someone I could be myself with, someone who didn’t see me as Zaneerah ‘the know it all nerd’ but rather Zaneerah the girl who still eats like a five year old , the girl who could never stop talking once she started, the girl who liked to fight for the silliest of things.

He appreciated my efforts yet it always kills me that somehow distance made all of that just disappear.
The person who was once the reason behind my smile is now the reason why I cry myself to sleep sometimes.

The conversation between me and Mohammed Sa’ad is one I will remember my entire life

***flashback***

“So you finally remembered I exist hey” I said, my voice evidently filed with sarcasm.

“Well hey to u too”, he said sarcastically while rolling his eyes.

“Oh please you have no right to be angry with me, I’m sorry but just to remind you I’m not the one who for the past flippen 2 months  didn’t contact my old friends even though I’m living in the same place as them, Oh and the best part ditching me when I needed you the most and not to forget the icing on the cake you getting engaged and you didn’t even tell me.”

“Don’t create a scene Zaneerah!. ” he said clearly not happy with all the attention I was drawing towards us.

“That’s all you have to say you know what I’m done with this conversation. ”

“Zaneerah, wait.” He turned me around and held both my shoulders with his strong arms and shook me and said
” I love her ok, you won’t understand since you have always been single you don’t understand whats it like to truly love someone so much. ”

***end of flashback ***

His words stung me badly.
Just hearing from the guy who I never really got over tell me he loves her and I don’t know what love is just broke me in ways that are indescribable.
Deep inside I knew I was shattered beyond repair.

         _______________________________

As narrated by Yaasir :

Never have I really seen a boy cry but that day I saw him crying I was confused, confused as hell shouldn’t Zaneerah be the one crying plus she already walked away.

So I decided to go up to him and confront him after a little while he told me everything some of his words Ill never forget especially when he said:

“Step into my shoes and you will understand,just imagine the girl you loved the most almost dying infront of your eyes that to because she tried to kill herself. ”

Turns out Mohammed Sa’ad is engaged to Maleeha because she’s pregnant but the bigger plot twist is that it’s not his child but Maleehas ex boyfriend who cheated her, who didn’t really love her he just wanted her, used her and threw her away as if she meant nothing to him in the first place.
Ismael sudden change in attitude broke her since she thought he truly loved her.
He just thought he did he truly was just infatuated not really in love, he merely just wanted revenge.

Maleeha approached Mohammed Sa’ad as soon as she found out that ismael played the plot and destroyed Mohamed Sa’ad and her relationship but his cold attitude towards her and her family pressure to abort the child was so much she couldn’t take it anymore so she went to Mohammed Sa’ad and slit her wrist before he could stop her.

She was immediately rushed to the hospital and thankfully she’s okay now. the two built on their relationship in a few months and their families agreed for a quick wedding due to Maleehas condition.
In this whole complicated situation is that Mohammed Sa’ad told his family that the child is his.

That day I saw this guy and I just felt like his an amazing person it takes guts to accept someone who is carrying someone else’s child. That day I started respecting him thousand times more.

I know now that I have a role model to look up to when it comes to love because I have never seen truer love then this.

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Slmz beloved readers

Just wanted to let you all know the next post will inshallah be after ramadhaan and I will officially be going on a short break and try to make the most that’s left of this blessed month.

Remember me in your precious duas

With love :
Ayesha Bibi 💜

Post Thirty seven: ( part 2)

Authors note :
Post dedicated to my amazing readers who gave me feedback on the blog and privately as well .
And to my silent readers I love youl just as much.
Last but not the least my amazing super crazy sweet bestfriend / sister / other half naaelah I love you loads.
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Enjoy ppl 😉😉

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As narrated by Yaasir :

Yusra, Yusraaa,Yusraaaaaaaa
But this girl can be abit deaf sometimes.

I waited a few minutes but when she still didn’t come I walked to her room and thankfully I did..

She layed on her bed with her head deeply sunken in her pillow as of she were crying.

“Yusra, are you ok?, I mean your room is so scattered and what is your phone doing on the floor.!?”

“I’m Okay, Yaasir leave me alone. “she replied without looking up.

“I really don’t like bikes you know that, it’s just to overrated .” I said rather I lied.

“Huh, what are you saying?”, she finally says while looking up at me

“If you can lie blatantly to me , so why cant I.” I said sternly.

” We going for a drive get ready in five minutes and I don’t want to hear any excuses .” I ordered without giving her a chance to argue.

“Okay.” she said softly.

(in the car)

“So, what’s wrong?. ”

“It’s a girl problem, you won’t understand. ”

“Ok, hmm I understand..
Can I borrow your phone quickly I forgot mine at home need to make a really urgent call to a friend for the soccer match tonight .” I said hoping she won’t catch on.

“okai.” she said while handing her phone to me

I went out of the car and quickly scrolled down whatsapp to find her most recent chat was with Riyaad.

At first I didn’t really find it strange because I do see them talking in school sometimes I mean they are classmates after all.

So who could it be?
Maybe it is Riyaad.

I sat back in the car and looked her straight in the eye trying my luck I finally said

“This is about Riyaad isn’t it.?”

“Ya huh no what, what are you saying??”she said quickly.

“Oh, I though it was about him since he likes you and stuff.” I said but was rudely interrupted

“He likes me? He told u,? When and how and why do you know” she asked and I could see her face light up.

Maybe if I didn’t do so many mistakes I wouldn’t have understood her.

” Loving someone can really mess you up, because most of the time we receive the most pain from the ones we give the most love to.

One sided love is hurtful,it’s like you would cross the ocean for the person yet they won’t even consider jumping a puddle for you but what’s even more strange is you will still love them because love is not entirely about attaining and possessing sometimes it’s all about appreciating and putting that persons happiness before yours.” she said almost tearing up.

“Look Yusra, I’m sorry.” I said genuinely hoping she won’t get angry.

“For? ”

“I don’t know if he likes you or not,but than again you my twin why wouldn’t he like you 😝
I was just checking to see if you like him or not.
Dont worry I won’t go all ” I will tell mum and dad and get you grounded for all your life. “. “, I tried to explain to her as calmly as I could.

“Yeah.. . “she said while looking out of the window.

“Really after that whole long speech all I get is a ya?!?” , I said acting all hurt.

“Lol Yaasir, sweet really, I appreciate what you trying to do its just I don’t know when it comes to Riyaad I don’t know if I’m right in liking him or not, does he like me or not. It’s just all so complicated.” she said looking at me.

“Riyaad’s a nice guy just getting a bit rebellious but why were you so upset then?.” I said.

” Leave my stories and tell me did you speak to Zaneerah. ” she said changing the topic and this time I let her.

“Let alone speak she doesn’t even acknowledge my presence I don’t blame her I just wish it could be different .”, I said .

“So why don’t you do something about it?.”she said.

“I’ll wait for her..” I said but was rudely interrupted again.

“No idiot!, what is up with you boys, girls do not ever take the first step! .”

“Other girls used to I mean you know my old one day girlfriends”

“Those girls were different Zaneerah is different all you have done so far is to make her hate you. You cant expect her to just magically fall in love with you because you suddenly like her now . You have to give her a reason to like you and that reason you going to have to find yourself. ” she said.

“Hmm ya thanks. ” I said deep in thought.
With that I drove her back home and set off on a drive on my own to think…

Maybe if I show her that the Yaasir she knows is not the only side of me I think I know what to do to give her a reason to love me.

Even if it means me destroying probably my own love story and making hers….
Maybe then she will realize I really do love her her truly and I’m not just messing around.

___________________________

With loads of love
and requesting a lot of duas ;

Ayesha Bibi 💜

Post Thirty seven: part one

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Quote of the day :
“If they are dumb enough to walk away, be smart enough to let go. ”
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
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As narrated by Zaneerah :

Few more days and Sumayya, Tasneem and Ashley will be writing their finals and the stress they are going under is quite evident on their faces recently .I miss them alot though since they on study leave since yesterday .

It was the beginning of break and it was just me by our spot we sit at during break , when ‘missus I like to put my nose in everyone’s business’ seems to arrive a.k.a Laila, with her ridiculous boot heels that are making noice for the dunya.

I swear at that moment all I wanted was the earth to swallow me up so she doesn’t see me but unfortunately shes walking towards me.
Great.

“Hey Zaneerah” she said with a fake sympathetic smile plastered on her face

     “Slmz, Laila” I said not really making eye contact.

“I came to ask you did you see Yaasir anywhere by any chance?, Oh wait!, I forgot he dumped you right, Oh sorry dear you poor soul.
Actually I’m not sorry you should have seen it coming where’s Yaasir and where’s you I mean look at yourself.” Laila said with a look of disgust as if in some weird dirty thing.

      “No, I dont know where Yaasir is , neither do I care, okay.” this time I said it looking her straight in the eye.

“Urgh whatever ” she said clearly annoyed at the fact that she couldn’t get to me.

I just read my novel for the rest of the break, when out of no where a soccer ball hits me on my head!
Yes straight on my head, embarrassing is not even the word to describe the situation.

Maybe if it were not for Laila,  I wouldn’t have been so edgy so instead of just not really bothering who kicked the ball, I got up and turned to face the boy who dared kicked that ball and said :

“Can’t you see where you kicking, you boys are stupid cant you’ll just sit quietly during break like normal civilized people but nooo let’s all run after a ball so we can be smelly, sweaty and tired.”

I finally recognized who I was talking to it was that boy at my welcome back party urr what was his name again..
Ah yes Riyaad.

Shame the poor guy, was just looking at me and not even saying anything, he probably thinks I’m sick in the head.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize it was you Riyaad.” I said quickly.

“You know my name?”  Riyaad said sounding genuinely shocked.

” Yes I do, lol ”

And that’s when the bell decides to ring thank god! that  saves me from an awkward and embarrassing situation.

“Slmz, I have to go to class sorry for shouting at you” And with that I left before he could reply.

The rest of my day went pretty normal just you know me trying to ignore the fact of Yaasir being in the same class as me.

         ________________________________
As narrated by Riyaad :

I. Spoke. To. Her.
I actually spoke to her, I don’t care if she was shouting me or not the mere fact that she knows me is like the first step towards me and her being together.

I need to think of how to take it forward besides she and Yaasir aren’t even together anymore.

Beep. Beep.

“Hey, what’s up.”

I looked at my phone to see another message from Yusra that reminds me I need to reply to her earlier messages.

“busy chat later.” I quickly type out I’ll see if Im liss to  chat to her later. Don’t get me wrong Yusras an amazing girl no doubt. She helps me out all the time but I see her as a friend and nothing else.

Sometimes she can be abit clingy, I mean she gets abit to annoying sometimes and I don’t know how to tell her but sometimes yoh I can’t handle it so I just don’t reply.

She pretty ya her profile pictures are cute and stuff but they nothing compared to Zaneerah.

She’s nice to talk to when I’m bored sometimes but other than that the only person I want to talk to is Zaneerah it seems impossible now but I’ll make it possible soon.

     ____________________________
Author’s note :

jzk to all those who commented is highly appreciated 😘 and it inspired me to write a new post for you’ll.

Comments / feedback = earlier new posts 🙈

Remember me in your duas I need them alot

With loads of love ;
Ayesha Bibi 💜

Post Thirty Six:

As narrated by Yaasir :

I woke up and immediately felt pain not the stinging pain in my hand but rather to the pain in my heart and head. Today is the day I’ll be going to school and seeing her again.

I was discharged the next day from hospital but had to take bed rest for a whole week. Usually I would never ever had agreed to stay at home or to stay with bed rest for a whole week but I know now I need it as a excuse for not confronting her.

I mean i finally know what it means like to be in love I finally understand what those stupid poems we do in school mean, I finally relate to all those love songs lyrics all because of her.

But I know she doesn’t feel the same and somehow even though I understand that it still feels like someone shattering my dreams over and over again and I don’t want that to happen .

As for my accident there isn’t really anyone to blame I was going by my friends I needed something to keep my mind off of the things that just occurred.

So I phoned them and they were at Rose bank so I was on my way driving there and I don’t remember clearly how but all I remember is a car crashed into my car and my hand protected my face and head and that’s how it got so badly fractured.

But that fractured hands pain is nothing compared to the pain I feel when I look at her with love and she looks at me with hate.

One good thing came out from all those though even though Yusra doesn’t say it but I know she has forgiven we have grown quite close this few days and I’m glad.
I somehow missed our twin bonding.

      ___________________________

As narrated by Zaneerah:

The weather usually dictates my mood and today it was cold and misty so that naturally already means, im going to be moody today.

I got ready and set out for school all normal just for all hell to break loose in school I walk in through the gates and I feel millions of curious eyes looking at me as if I’m an alien or something and that’s when I notice him..

Yaasir. Oh god!,his back.

Back to make my life miserable but uh uh I ain’t going to let him this time.

I lifted up my head and walked like normal passed them as if I had never see him in the first place usually he’d come behind me, today he didn’t and I’m glad.

The day wasn’t so bad after all besides you know the stares I was getting and the hushed voices as I walked past people who know me or should I say knew me.

Ever since Yaasirs accident I have been sitting with a few new people namely sumayya, tasneem and Ashley . They in grade 12 but they are hellava sweet and down to earth they not the ones who feed on gossip to stay alive they actually fun and happy-go-lucky type of people and I’m glad I found them.

As for my old group of friends I greet and smile that’s all I can do and I don’t expect more from them either.

In life things happen you meet people and they play a huge part in your story but then that chapter ends and you going to have to turn the page and start a new chapter whether you like it not, life goes on..
I learnt to forgive them for everything and maybe one day they will forgive me to because for all I know their is no use holding onto grudges that weigh you and your happiness down.

Today I can bravely and boldly say that I’m not afraid of falling because I know,
I can get back up on my own without anyone’s support or sympathy.

________________________________

As narrated by Yusra:

Bzzzzzzzz
I heard my phone vibrate it was a message from Riyaad I immediately opened it.

It read :

“Hey, how’s Yaasir feeling I heard he was in school today.”

Riyaad and I had been chatting for a while but most of the time it would end up in him taking forever to reply and me replying as soon as I see his message.
Or sometimes him saying things which are sometimes abit hurtful but at times it would be like he cares, so in total I don’t understand what’s going on in his head.

In school we barely talk, his always to busy with his friends and stuff and sometimes I worry his changing..
The way he talks to people and the way his attitude is nowadays and I somehow feel it’s because of his friends.

Change is inevitable this past few months or should I say year alot of things have changed some for the better and some for the worse.
It’s almost the end of the year and it felt like just yesterday when I was dreading the first day of school.

When I told shagufta about Riyaad and my chats she said something..
Something that’s been stuck in my head for while

“Look Yusra don’t get me wrong or take offense please but I sometimes think he chats to you as if his doing you a favor.
You running after him and humiliating yourself when you deserve so much more better.”

Maybe it’s true, maybe I do deserve better but how do I explain that to my heart.

I want to be there for him I want to help him because I know how his behaving now is not him. I have seen the true him, the humble soul I fell for.

____________________________

Authors note /feedback📝 :
*Requesting comments on the following*

>Should Yaasir convince Zaneerah that he truly loves her

>Is Zaneerah right by moving on from her old friends

> Is Yusra blinded in love what should Shagufta do to help her

>Is Riyaad right in chatting to Yusra while he claims to be madly in love with Zaneerah.

With love and requesting loads of duas;
Ayesha ❤

Not a post 🙈😭😨

Slmz everyone how are you’ll all doing

Okay so I know I have been missing and left youl hanging in quite a bit I really apologize I myself promise to write you’ll a post after my exams get done I am still continuing the blog till post 50 or so. Make me maaf and sooon after exams I will try to post as much as I can

Loads of love ayesha ❤

Post Thirty five (part 2):

As narrated by Yusra
We reached the hospital to find an unconscious Yaasir. My dad was just about to look for the doctor for further information on Yaasirs condition when the doctor walked in who later on i found out was doctor Mohammed surti .

Dr : His a fighter , oh yes Mr Ally he was brought here in a horrible state blood oozing out of his hand non stop but thanks to the Al-mighty his okay now just one small urr bad news..

Dr : Im afraid that if he doesn’t gain consciousness by 24 hours than this could cause complications .
As a muslim all i can say is make dua . Other than that he should be perfectly fine just a cast on his hand.

With that my mother looked at my father defeated and went hystericle,
What if something happens to my baby !
What if my baby doesn’t gain consciousness !?!

“Zaahirah nothing will happen to him have faith make dua come lets go, u need water.” and after my father having said that he instructed me to not leave Yaasir’s side.

Once they left i felt the need to burst and speak my heart out. Sure Yaasir isn’t dying and shukr his condition is not that critical but nobody knows whens the last goodbye.

Here lying infront of me was my twin, my once best friend but most importantly my brother.

Yaasir I don’t know if you can hear me or not but if you can I want you to know that no matter how many mistakes you have made, no matter how much you irritate the living hell out of me but you will always have a spot in my life that no one can ever replace.

I know we may have grown distant but I will make sure to change that, I will make sure I try to mend our bond and for that I need you to cooperate with me I cant do this on my own I need my twin I need my brothers actual presence back in my life.

After pouring my heart out I finally felt lighter and better. I know now that my mission is Yaasir I will do everything I can to change him back to the original Yaasir, the true Yaasir.

With loads of love :
Ayesha ❤

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Ayesha ♥