As narrated by Zaneerah :
Life is not a movie and definitely not a fairytale in which all love stories end happily ever after.
The difficult part of living in reality is even though your heart seems to be broken beyond repair, your face still reflects a smile that hides the inner loneliness you going through.
Mohammed Sa’ad a guy I tried so hard to forget but truly never could. I kept myself busy the whole time trying to keep my mind away from all the fun times we had together as friends but at the back of my mind they there imprinted in my brain forever .
I was frustrated with myself, angry at everyone especially at myself because I had never felt this empty.Why was it so difficult for me to move on from something that was never mines.
I always used to look at Maleehas photos and wonder what does she have that i don’t. Why can’t the people we love, love us back.
I had lost alot in my life, my Nani, my bestfriends, my bestfriend/love and mostly I lost myself somewhere along the way. My heart ached to be the old Zaneerah. The happy innocent hardworking lovable Zaneerah..
Usually some people resort to drugs or maybe smoking or cutting themselves but one thing I know is that those are a few things I can never bring myself to do but what then do people like me do !.
My frustration, my sadness and loneliness all built up to change me from Zaneerah the calm approachable girl to Zaneerah with a short temper before I knew it I started pushing more and more people away and built such big walls around me that it was next to impossible to break.
But my heart will never give up hoping that one day someone will see me past those huge walls.
As narrated by Yusra :
Yusra Ally, yes that’s who I am and who I always will be regardless of who is or isn’t in my life.
Riyaad and I were never anything as Shagufta explained to me when I went to visit her one day, that we are still young damn I’m only 16 for crying out aloud!
I have a lot in my life to look forward to besides boys and love.
I’m independent for my age and smart enough to let go of people I read a quote once that said
“Why should I be upset?, I have lost someone who didn’t love me. Whereas they lost someone who loved them more than anyone ever could have.”
Everything happens when it’s destined to happen and one day I know I will find someone who is made for me but I know that time is not now.
At times though, I do wonder will I ever get a partner like how I imagine?.
Unlike most girls, I know I don’t dream of a Prince Charming coming to rescue me on his white horse, all I want is a simple modest honest guy whose genuine in his feelings who cares for me and respects me and everyone elder and smaller than him.
Someone to whom I’ll mean the world to, I don’t need him to rescue me from the world I can do that myself I need him to be by my side supporting me through my battles.
Someone who falls in love with my scars and secrets.
As narrated by Shagufta :
They say a girl always looks for her fathers shadow or image in her future husband in my case it’s not exactly true.
When I was young, I would get jealous hearing how most girls would be their fathers angel or princess but on the hand I was also content with the little attention and love I got from my dad but as I grew older that love instead of growing started diminishing.
I may not have any boy problems but I do have family problems, I guess everyone fights a certain battle but it’s these battles that makes us stronger all we have to do is be patient.
Right now at home is like a war zone and you know most normal people usually look forward to going home after school or work but not me I dread it.
I dread having to come home and see my parents fight like cats and dogs over the silliest of things. Ever since my dad has brought my grandparents home who need extreme attention since they cannot walk around or move my mom has gone mad. She cannot take the pressure and the constant nagging of her mother in law. And it feels like his changed, his slowly being pushed away from us from my mother
I don’t understand how can someone I know and love transform so easily into someone I’m forced to despise.
I still don’t understand how something so little can break a home? But it did.
One thing I hate is going to school laughing, smiling and not letting a single soul know how difficult it is to pull myself together.
Life is full of challenges, one other challenge that I face and usually normal girls just like me face is society and the emphasis and importance they put on outer beauty rather then inner beauty.
I never get how the human mind works I mean if we have to go and buy a phone do we just look at the phones and see which one looks the best or do we check the features of the phone aswell.
So then why do we treat humans differently..
All my life I have judged because of me being Indian, of my dark skin color, so what if I don’t look picture perfect!?!
Does my personality and goodness count for nothing?
Does my ability to get up everyday smiling, laughing, spreading happiness without complaining to anyone even for a single second about my own grief not count!
As of now I just want to escape somewhere I don’t know where I just want to be anywhere but home.
Authors note :
IM REALLY SORRY FOR THE LACK OF POSTS 😥
Soo i really hope you all liked all the girls point of views and whats going on in their lives the next post will be about the boys
But unfortunately the next post will only be after my exams 😭😭😭
Soooo please bare with me ❤
Requesting loads of duas