As narrated by Zaneerah :
For the first time since ages I didn’t regret getting up for school.I knew I didn’t have to duck and dive from Yaasir.
I got ready early for school and reached there early just to realize that there’s no one to come early to ..
I have no one to stand with, to talk with. I got no friends and it’s not even my fault. My hate and anger for Yaasir was building up even more I didn’t know I could hate someone so much before I met Yaasir.
I watched as time passed and more people started pouring in. I could feel their curious sympathetic eyes on me, I could even imagine what they thinking ‘Oh shame look at her all alone ‘ but that’s not what I want I don’t want cheap and fake sympathy.
I avoided making any eye contact hoping someone comes up to talk to me but no one did.
Finally our teacher came and we got In class I looked around and realized Yaasir was absent. Thank God that saves me from that.
Sometimes in life what you give is not exactly what you get back it’s not always fair but there’s nothing we can do about it but get through it without breaking down. Sometimes we need to be strong just for ourselves.
Break came and my heart started beating faster than usual my head racing with millions of thoughts but I headed to the library. My safe place I can’t exactly call it my happy place since I’m not always happy when I go there.
Usually I enjoy being alone, I enjoy my own company but today I needed my old friends and my old self.
I needed my Shaguftas big bear hug, I needed Yusra funny comments I needed their presence back in my life but I have pushed them so far that I know they might never come back.
The rest of the day was like a blur, strangely I wasn’t really enjoying the day as I thought it would. I think I over expected things I thought that things would magically just be okay. I thought that Yusra would atleast be there for me since she knows the truth but as usual I was disappointed. Sigh.
Why is it that the people we love and expect the most from are the ones who hurt us the most.
Why even after knowing the consequences of our expectations is disappointed we still never learn.
As narrated by Yusra:
Yaasir didn’t return that whole night, no one knows where he is not even my parents.
As much as I hate what his done at the end of the day his my brother, my twin my other half.
The whole day in school I tried secretly finding out from Yaasirs friends about his whereabouts but I got nothing.
Scary thoughts kept flashing in my mind but deep down I know my brother , he can’t be that weak he will not resort to any thing drastic. Hopefully…
Later on that day my father got a call, a call that almost shattered everyone in my house all I could make out was my father’s worried grief-stricken facial expressions. I didn’t know what was going on but all we did was follow our dad to the car.
My mother bombarded my father with questions as soon as we hit the road . If only she knew the truth was going to be a bitter pill to swallow.
“It was a call from hospital . Yaasirs was found critical and we need to get there for further details from what I can make out its an accident case.” My father replied but I could make out from his voice he was trying his best not to break down, for us.
My mother on the other hand was broken she was shattered to bits he was her favourite after all.
My heart sank thinking about all those things I told him earlier that I’m ashamed his my brother deep down even If he does not know it I love him dearly and I dont know of I’ll ever be able to forgive myself if something happens to him.